Two weeks ago, we looked at the way that the relational disconnection caused by betrayal triggers shame about our worthiness, value and our ability to ... Read More »
Attachment Shame and Disconnection
In last week’s post I defined attachment shame as a specific type of shame felt by betrayed partners around their experience of connection and ... Read More »
Attachment Shame
One of the most common questions I hear from betrayed partners who have decided to try and stay in the relationship with the cheater is this: “What ... Read More »
The Cycle of Ambivalence
In last week’s post we discussed the issue of attachment ambivalence. Attachment ambivalence is the phenomenon of having two opposing safety ... Read More »
Partner Betrayal & Attachment Ambivalence
A concept coined by Michelle Mays, attachment ambivalence is the relational dilemma that occurs when betrayed partners' fear and attachment systems ... Read More »
The Temptation to Make Big Decisions Fast
Humans do not like uncertainty. We like a clear direction. An arrow pointing the way. A road that is paved and marked with bright yellow stripes ... Read More »
Should I Cut My Losses?
“Should I cut my losses and leave now?” If you’ve asked this question, you’re not alone. Many if not most betrayed partners wrestle with thoughts ... Read More »
Am I Staying Forever?
After discovery of infidelity, betrayed partners often feel pressured to make a black and white decision about leaving or staying in their ... Read More »
Stay or Leave: Permission to Not Know
In the immediate aftermath of discovering betrayal, emotions run high for both the betrayed partner and the offending partner. There is chaos and ... Read More »